When I started out as a FemDomme, I started out as an online Financial Dominatrix way back in January 2006.
Back then, We were also known as Money Mistresses, and the acronyms “findom” and “findomme” had yet to be utilised, probably because this was all before Twitter when words needed to be shortened to fit the 140 character limitation.
Before Twitter, Financial Domination was what it was designed to be, and not what it has now become.
Financial Domination, in its purest form, is money for nothing in return.
Well, not exactly nothing. I mean, who would give money to another for no reason at all? Do you give a gift for no reason? Or because it pleases you to give gifts, or to see the receiver of said gift happy?
So Findom in its purest form was, and still is in My world at least, based on this premise, that what the submissive or money slave or financial slavery fetishist is getting out of it, is that he is being of service to his Domme, he gets a kick out of pleasing Her, or, in many cases, he feels humiliated that he feels this urge to give his money to a Woman he worships, and that humiliation is an addictive feeling that is very quickly only satiated by spending larger and larger amounts.
So what the Financial Dominatrix is doing, is creating an opportunity for the money slave (or finsub as they are often now known, although in the early days, they were called “paypigs” or “pay sluts”), to indulge his fetish for handing money to a Woman that he deems superior to him or more deserving of his money.
Findom is meant to be an act of service. A way to show your Domina that you want to provide for Her and make Her life easier and more luxurious, or at the very least, contribute in the most tangible and beneficial way you can, financially.
With the rise of Twitter and hashtags, and mainstream media shining a light on this somewhat “bizarre” fetish, the world of Findom has become a very different beast.
Young girls selling pussy pics for a buck a piece and calling it #findom is NOT what Findom is about.
And sadly as a result, many, many subs are now stipulating in their Twitter profiles that they are “not into Findom”.
My dear, if you knew what Findom actually is, you wouldn’t be so quick to be adverse to it.
Of course there are more extreme versions of Financial Domination, where the Domme quite literally dominates the sub out of his money by way of coercion or even blackmail, a fetish in and of itself - and something I do not partake in.
For Me, Findom is about being served financially by My subs who want to contribute to the ease and luxury of My life. Who find deep satisfaction in being given the opportunity to benefit Me in a way that is actually useful to Me, and who get a real fetish kick out of seeing Me have and enjoy a lot of money, money that they contributed.
The power exchange in itself is a huge rush, for both the sub and Myself. Money is power after all, and when you acknowledge My power over you, by handing Me the only power you have, money, we experience a total power exchange in a very real sense. This produces an incredible erotic rush for us both!
Findom is NOT money for services, or content such as photos and videos. Yes, I may send you photos and videos in order to encourage your spending, but you are not BUYING anything from Me in traditional, authentic Findom.
Which brings Me to a word on tipping.
If you enjoy what I, or any other Woman tweets, tip Her in one of the many ways She talks about on Her Twitter.
If you enjoy the content She works hard to create for Her Onlyfans account, tip Her.
Just as you would tip your waitress for excellent service, you should be tipping the Women who’s content and labour you are benefiting from and enjoying.
When I remind you of this, I am not trying to ‘financially dominate’ you. I cannot force you to send Me money, Findom is and should always be consensual, and since I do not partake in blackmail, there is no way for Me to force you.
However, I will remind you that you should be tipping at the very least.
So when you are jerking off to My content, and I remind you to tip, telling Me that you are “not into Findom” reads as you saying you just want to take and never give back, and that’s pretty shitty of you.
And finally, if you feel drawn to compliment Me or any Woman online, take a second to remember that there is nothing you can say to any of Us that We haven’t already heard a million times before, rendering you, and your “compliment” pointless.
If you truly want to compliment a Woman online, send Her a tip/tribute instead. She can actually do something with that and it will mean so much more as well as make you memorable, instead of yet another random guy on the internet telling Her some empty, meaningless, and often totally uncreative “compliment”.
A compliment is not a compliment unless it’s paid in cash. After all, actions speak louder than words.
What your meaningless compliment actually is, is a cry for attention, and no Woman online running a business has the time to give you free attention - and you are not owed free attention - She is already busy giving attention to those who value it, by way of their wallets.
So if you TRULY appreciate what She works hard to create, your money goes way further than your words.
So, always, put your money where your mouth is, and render yourself memorable, instead of yet another guy trying to take up Her time.